C Y N T H I A L U V S ♥.♥

Posted on 23 February 2012 ♥

Had been staying home for 5 days and I'm so sick of staying home yet I'm too broke to head out because if I go out, I can forget about going to Fate's birthday celebration on Saturday! Speaking of that, I'm so excited! Like finally I can get my ass out of the house! Hiak, 2 more days! :D

Anyway! I tried the wasabi fillet-o-fish from McDonald's and the wasabi is nostril-searing hot. Not a fan of wasabi but just wanna give the new burger a try and it's not too bad because the usual fillet-o-fish is really boring but a suggestion is to eat it at home else you will do the 'omg-i'm-gonna-sneeze' face infront of your friends while eating! :S

Slept at random crazy timings like 4-5 in the morning recently or even 9-10am! Oh man, my body clock so screwed and when I'm awake, most people would have been busy in their dreams and I would be left alone like again!

And yesterday, I actually had my own fun with the remaining helium balloons which was given by Berlin during vday! After playing, I even camwhored without makeup! Brave or what? :P

Many thoughts running through my head while I'm all alone at night these few days.

Yup! I do self reflection on myself whenever I'm free, thinking back on all the things I've said or done. I realised I changed alot... why? The world forces me to change.

I've changed.. to more self-centered, no longer giving any fucks to those unappreciative bunch of people. I'm really sick of knowing new people then hangout for weeks or maybe a few months then they left my life, leaving me with those memories, be it happy or sad ones. It's like why should I cry with the memories, when you are having the time of your life? Why should I be the one hanging on while everyone else is moving on.

I don't understand why some people finds that it's okay to leave your life and then come back as when they feel like it or when they need help, like hello? I'm not your haven or someone who you can come to when you're bored or left alone. I'm a human, I've fucking feelings. Call me selfish or insecure, I just hate those who only bother to contact me only when they have no shits to do or as when they are super bored and need someone to entertain them or when they need help. Like knn, where the fuck was you when I need someone?

Talks are cheap, words without actions are bullshits. Don't tell me you miss me when you can't even make an effort to meet me and don't tell me you love me when you're never there for me.

That's the reason why I appreciate and thankful for people who actually make the effort to contact me once every 2-3days, giving me help and support when I actually need it, lending their listening ears and shoulder when I'm down. It's just the handful who do that and I'm happy to know and have them in my life.

Because I've been hurt too much times that's why I don't trust people anymore. It's just the handful which I put my 100% trust on them because they have seen me during my worst time yet they stayed through with me. Rest? Nah, i don't need. It's not as if you're food, water, oxygen or shelter, I"ll be just fine without you. ;)

I don't need people who don't need me just like if I'm not your priority then don't expect yourself to be in my priority.

Feels so shiok after ranting. :D Lol, this was supposed to be a random post but now, it becomes a ranting post!

Labels: Rants